Gentle Push

                                              
I am not an advocate of long distance. It is something that I had dreaded happening most of May. Randomly, at least once a day while in Managua (besides the fact that I was sick) I would break out into tears, dreading the way that I was going to feel when I had to step onto that plane by myself and tell Jeff bye for 2 months. I know serving with Young Life in Managua has been something that Jeff has desired to do all semester. I could just see a strong desire to serve in his expression and in his eagered anticipation. I rarely spoke regarding myself or my own emotions, but I knew that if I would explain my selfish desire to keep him close and in the states, would be merely that, a selfish desire. Therefore I kept my mouth closed and tried my hardest to keep the tears back and silently dreaded the anticipation of the summer separation.

Fast forward to me crying the distance of 3 countries back to Texas, and barely being audible trying to explain to the American customs that I was fine and not in danger- but merely being an emotional girl, was not necessarily my greatest day. I was able to talk to Jeff unexpectedly a few days later (Monday night) on the phone. During that short conversation, he explained that he had drawn the verse Philippians 1 from a hat and was going to be teaching the other YL interns the following day when they got together for their devotional. After hanging up, I read the verse, and knew instantly that I needed to stop my worrying and that the summer actions, travels, and plans, were ordained by none other than our God.

 "I thank my God every time I remember you. Whenever I pray, I make my requests for all of you with joy, for you have been my partners in spreading the Good News about Christ from the time you first heard it until now. And I am certain God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.

    

 So it is right that I should feel as I do about all of you, for you have a special place in my heart. You share with me the special favor of God, both in my imprisonment and in defending and confirming the truth of the Good News. God knows how much I love you and long for you with the tender compassion of Christ Jesus.

 I pray that your love will overflow more and more, and that you will keep on growing in knowledge and understanding. For I want you to understand what really matters, so that you may live pure and blameless lives until the day of Christ's return. May you always be filled with the fruit of your salvation- the righteous character produced in your life by Jesus Christ- for this will bring much glory and praise to God. "

I love how God can always give those gentle pushes in explaining to our minds, that he knows exactly what will happen- and exactly the purpose it will play in our lives. In this verse, Paul is in prison and thanking God that he has had the ability to meet these people, and regardless of what is happening to him in prison- people are still spreading the good news and praying and building their relationship with God. It is not because Paul has encouraged it- but because the people desire and want it on their own- and to follow in obedience, no matter the risk. Paul explains how much the people had played an impacting role in his life, and how much the distance and separation takes a toll on him- but that he knows it is in the goodness of God that all things play out in His manner. I need to rest in this actions of this summer as being just that- the distance will be a toll, but all in all we are still serving God.

4 days until I start my 30 hour flight towards India!

Pictures from Managua

               Texas Pete's Hotter Hot Sauce! I was excited about the Texas
               Pete being at the hotel... I was only allowed to have a small dip
               bc It was my first meal to eat since I got sick...
                              But that one dip was awesome :-)

                              

                    Power aid was my "save all meal" in Nica.